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Thursday, July 16th, 2009
5:16 pm - Yay!
According to my last.fm profile, I have a rather eclectic musical preference. I'm so proud of myself.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Tuesday, July 7th, 2009
7:08 pm
I just had a flashbulb moment of insight a bit ago, regarding Captain Jack Sparrow. Specifically, I realized that I finally understand the nature of his ship longing. It struck me that while I don't possess any desire so strong for a thing, I have, for many years now, so longed for a wife. Before now, I liked Jack, but I didn't understand what was so important about that particular ship, but now, I can see the connection. It's really quite interesting to suddenly find one's self empathizing so suddenly.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Thursday, July 2nd, 2009
4:30 pm - I've been listening to too much rap.
Pop the beat, and rock the mike
Take a seat, or take a hike
Don't stop, don't break
Don't drop, for your sake
Blast the rhymes so loud
Let it flow and blast the crowd
Shake it off and dodge the blows
Sling it off and take your foes
Kill it fast, kill it hard
Make it last, blast the yard

(throw a monkey on the fire)

1:11 pm - *eyes bleed*
Please tell me that this is not a real book. Please?

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Tuesday, June 30th, 2009
11:32 am
I had an odd dream last night. I was trying to teach my mom how to play Go. Naturally, there were no playing pieces, so we had to make them out of random crap. It was weird. And at the end, some musician started playing, but it sounded so much like Blue Sunny Day by JoCo, that my brother, mother, and I all started singing said JoCo song.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Sunday, June 28th, 2009
12:51 pm
I had some rather disturbing dreams last night. They were both quite detailed and vivid. In fact, I've been having many such dreams for weeks now, and it's beginning to weird me out a bit. For some reason, I'm not going into a deep and restful sleep. Yesterday I busted my butt helping with a friend's wedding, and was completely exhausted by the time I went to sleep, and yet...dreams. I think I'll ask my doc about it when I go in for a physical tomorrow. Blech.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Wednesday, June 24th, 2009
12:03 pm
The mail lady in my neighborhood has a striking resemblance to Lavernya from Malcolm in the Middle. She was the one in Alaska giving crap to Frances, if you recall. It is a most disturbing thing to have someone who resembles her coming by every day.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Friday, June 5th, 2009
6:16 pm - *headdesk*
My counselor suggested that I try out eharmony this summer, so last night before bed, I did. I forgot that there would be a lot of questions, and didn't get done until about 2:20am. This was, of course, a fairly bad time for me to discover that I fit in the 20% who can't be properly pegged and/or matched. Ugh. That was fairly disappointing for moi, I must say. Sadly, I don't think that I should be all that surprised at the results. I fit in with a fairly small subsection of any given population.

I recently took a personality test, and discovered that I am an ISTJ, which is only 6% of the general populous, but that I was split like 55/45 S/N, which I'm guessing is even further unique. Needless to say, my future mate will have to be one hell of a unique woman. I'm sure she won't be hard to find at all...

current mood: depressed

(2 screaming monkeys | throw a monkey on the fire)

Saturday, May 23rd, 2009
5:39 pm - Rant
Why do people of late think that the government is the answer to everything? Starting with the founding fathers, there have been many generations of people who believed that limited federal government was the best way to go. One of the main reasons for the war with England was because the king was too controlling, taxing the people to death and requiring ridiculous things like the housing of soldiers. Yet, what do we find as the popular train of thought today? We want the government to handle everything for us. People have griped for years about how absolutely incompetent the government can be in handling things, from building things, to distributing money efficiently. And we want to give them more?! You know, there's a damn good reason for the second amendment to exist, and it's not because of hunting. It is there specifically so that the common people will always have the means of defending themselves against the government, should it ever become a bad one. I'm not saying our government is there yet, but I sure as hell don't want to help it get there by just handing every part of our lives over to them to control. That's just not a great idea.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Wednesday, May 6th, 2009
12:32 am - Hooray for boardgames!
Last night, my roommate and I got into a lengthy discussion about a new variant of the game of Life that I would so love to make. It's a christian version called Martyrdom, and my thought is that it might not be for kids of a younger age... It totally had my roomy and I laughing hysterically at what we could do in the game. Like, instead of having Life tiles, one accrues treasures in heaven, and just like the dud tiles, some will be but hay and stubble. And instead of money, one wins and loses followers, some to heresy, and others to gruesome deaths! Yay! Anyone who didn't get that it was a sort of tongue in cheek thing would either think it awesome, or possibly blasphemous, but I would totally love to make such a game. Instead of professions, one would get gifts of the spirit. Along the way, one could do things like call down fire to burn the wicked, or live in a cave like a hermit for a while to gain humility points. I am amused already.

current mood: amused

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Sunday, May 3rd, 2009
11:42 pm - Midnight Pancake Madness!
Well, not madness per se, maybe more of a pancake giddiness. My house is having a midnight study-for-finals and pancakes night. The pancakes are banana and chocolate chip, though only a few people actually have to study. It's pretty cool though.

(1 screaming monkey | throw a monkey on the fire)

Monday, April 20th, 2009
2:57 pm - Dream dream dream
I had a most vivid dream last night. In fact, I have been having very vivid dreams for days now, though last night's seems to be sticking with me more than some of the others. Parts of it were inconsequential, of course, and thus were gone as soon as I awoke, but the important parts seem to be with me still. It involved a young man, a boy at first, who, along with some others, received a dual bladed staff weapon as a gift. It was intricate and more rectangular than circular, but the important thing was that it contained a blade on both ends, which could be capped with the same material as the shaft of the weapon.

The boy grew, honing greatly his skills with the weapon. It seems many young men had such a weapon, for several were sparring with him at one point, though he was far and above the better. At some point, the young man decided to build himself a kind of danger-room, made with some old, advanced technology. Lots of light tubes and whatnot. Once made, the room seemed to be made of liquid darkness, almost living. It could allow for things to come through it, such as enemies, and could move, change shape and solidity.

The most important part of the room was the AI, gotten from who knows where. It had a woman's voice and was highly intelligent, creating challenge after harder challenge for the young man. Then came the day when he reached his peak and managed to defeat her best challenge. And then she presented her finale: she tells him that he must defeat her and the room itself, revealing her sensors and wires and the like. He hesitates, not willing to destroy her. She insists, and he submits, tearing through her with skill.

It was here that another man appears. I think he was supposed to be a friend to the young man, though perhaps not a close one. The young man and his friend hang out in the trashed and sparking room, which doesn't actually seem like a great idea in retrospect. In a friendly wrestling match, the friend accidentally electrocutes the young man, seemingly killing him. The friend flees in panic. The scene ends.

The scene opened with the young man rising to his feet, and if I ever make a story of this, should be bleeding a bit, maybe charred some. There is a sparkle in the air, and AI whom he thought he'd destroyed stands before him. Her face remains the same, while her body shifts between various female forms. Now a fairy, now a warrior; now with short hair, now with long; now with these clothes, now with others. I had the feeling that these were all forms that he had created in the past in this room. The AI woman draws close to him and tells him that if he wants, they can be together forever. He agrees, and they come together. As they come together, she envelopes him in a large cocoon of some substance resembling a solid, opaque rainbow, almost like being in a large, somewhat oily pill. Fade out.

The dream opened again with the friend returning, to see that the young man is not dead. The friend sees him writhing and twitching on the floor, looking as if brain damaged, with muscles contorted. A very slim filament of bright substance is winding it's way all about him, flowing over and around. In a sudden change of character, the friend becomes angry, almost jealous, and in a moment grabs a still sparking wire and shoves it into the two, declaring that they will so die together. The "friend" then storms out. A pause.

There is a twinkle in the air, then a shifting, and the cocoon comes into view. Scene.

I'm not really sure what to think about this dream. I do not really know which ending is real, be it the eternal embrace of the two, or the mental damage and subsequent death of the boy. Words cannot adequately convey the feel of the dream either, be it the disturbing nature of the AI's desires, or why the young man accepted. In the dream, it seemed like he was training for some future need. Not to mention that he did not seem to love her, though he was close and felt comfort, being around her voice so often. The question that struck me when he agreed was why he chose to be with her forever when before he was just using her skills to become his best with the weapon. Nor do I understand why the friend so suddenly turned and willingly killed the young man. The dream has given me many deep questions as to the nature of these characters, and how the heck I could ever try to actually write about them.

current mood: thoughtful

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Tuesday, April 7th, 2009
8:54 pm - It was the best of times, it was the cliche of times.
Last night's home church worship night that I go to was absolutely amazing. It was one of the best nights I've ever seen there. So much astounding things happened, too many to be believed, so I won't mention them.

Of the bad, I've had a most unique headache today. My head hurts, but the location, the top of my head and the forehead, are very unique. Add to that that I can seem to feel my heartbeat in my head and a bit of dizziness, and I can honestly say that I've never had such an odd occurrence. There is a very real possibility that I am going through withdrawals of my anti-depression/anxiety medicine (due to some snafu with my doctor, the pharmacy, and my health insurance). Whatever it is, I'd really rather like it to stop.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Saturday, March 21st, 2009
10:12 pm - Come thou words
The words burn deep within
but do not come.
Oh thou flow of endless depth,
come thou gnawing flames
and be quenched in fulfillment.
Oh, would that they would come,
that they would twine and grow.
Come, oh come thou flow!
Race and rush and run!
Climb, tumble and be frantic!
Come thou light and shine,
as I call and shout,
as I name and cry forth.
Tomorrow will come again,
and you'll be gone.
But before you go, come!
Let the words rush and gush
in endless stream.
Crawl and weave, if need be,
but do not stray far.
Duck and dodge, but oh,
come thou river of speech,
come before I fade away!
Oh, what hole thou leaves,
what channels and rivulets inside.
Come tomorrow, shall I be,
shall I know of thine voice?

current music: Save Tonight

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Thursday, March 19th, 2009
5:35 pm - Fic bug burrowing
Much as this flu I am still nursing, I have likewise caught the writing bug since watching Superman Returns last night. The idea of down the line there being many, many descendants of Superman gives me all kinds of awesomeness in my brain. I may even post some later.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Thursday, March 12th, 2009
11:22 pm - Icky
With absolutely no warning, I awoke this morning to find myself most unpleasantly ill. Weakness, aches, painful joints, throat and nose stuff, you know, the works. I was actually feeling terribly good last night, yet this morning, definitely not. Naturally, today was the day that I completely ran out of food and absolutely had to go shopping. I didn't even have any more jelly for a pbj sandwich. I'm glad I now have food enough for several days now, but dang, not fun shopping sick. Achy! Even a nap didn't help. Blech.

current mood: sick

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Sunday, March 8th, 2009
12:09 am - Winnow
Let it be known most assuredly that before God there is but one standard for right and wrong. And this standard is absolute, unchangeable, immovable. We shall all be judged according to this standard. Whatever we may say or feel or believe or surmise today, we will suffer loss on that day if what we do is not truly according to the will of God.

Watchman Nee in Spiritual Knowledge

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Thursday, March 5th, 2009
12:48 am - For future reference for myself.
Note to self: Funny comedian Brad Stine.

(throw a monkey on the fire)

Tuesday, March 3rd, 2009
12:58 am - So Awesome
Okay, so I totally got a quite large squirrel to come right up to me yesterday at the tea house. From it's boldness, and size, I would hazard a guess that it is used to getting scraps from people. I was a little hesitant to try to touch it, as one never knows what they might have, but I at least got within just a few inches of it, which is just so awesome. I do so love animals. Next time I might actually be brave/stupid enough to let it eat from my hand.

(1 screaming monkey | throw a monkey on the fire)

Tuesday, February 24th, 2009
10:39 pm - Too true
In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function. We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honour and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful.
C.S. Lewis from The Abolition of Man

(throw a monkey on the fire)


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